The Guide You have Been Searching for: The best way to Speak to Girls
If you’re reading this, it only means one thing.
No, not that you’re unable to get a date or score high with a hot lady.
It’s about you getting tongue-tied when in front of a woman you like, want, need, or are attracted to (or all of the above).
Not that you simply can’t say anything and can do nothing else but marvel at her female gloriousness mutely. It’s just that at some point, that eerie, awkward silence creeps in and you get a mini anxiety attack from not knowing how to move things forward.
But hey, if you’re one of those who do get all tongue-tied and mutely stare at a gorgeous girl in all her sexy charming self, it helps to get on with it and admit you need help. You’re in luck – the next few paragraphs will probably change your life.
Not her name or number right away, of course. If there’s anything you observe in her or your surroundings, state it as a question.
For example: “Isn’t the weather really nice today?”
Sounds cliché? Well, that’s just to illustrate the point being made here. Create your own original and sincere query and she will engage in a conversation with you.
It’s even better if it’s something about the spot of dirt on her shoe (women don’t like that on her beloved footwear!) or if it’s something that’s falling out of her bag, pocket, folder, or anything she’s carrying with her.
You can also ask about the color of her eyes, if it’s truly of an unusual hue. You can also ask her to do something small for you, like asking her to pass you a table napkin, give you tissue, or have her look out on your stuff while you make a dash for the toilet or get a cup of coffee.
Find anything not-so-ordinary about her or your surroundings and turn that into your conversation starter. You’ll naturally veer to the part where you’ll exchange names… And numbers.
Think Out Loud
“I heard there’s a new bookstore/coffee shop/restaurant/museum opening down the street tomorrow/2 days from now/this weekend.”
“Oh, is there?”
“Yeah, really. It’s called the (insert establishment name here). I was wondering if you’re interested in checking it out cause I’m going there tomorrow/2 days from now/this weekend.”
Well, you can also just say, “Yes. Wanna come with me?”
Harmless request, right? That’s the tone you should be angling for: safe, friendly, and casual. No pressure. You don’t feel as burdened into silence in the run up to this line and she won’t feel as if you’re cornering her.
You can also bring up the latest news, as long as it’s a topic that’s “safe” and public knowledge. Stories about someone getting raped or murdered by a cannibal or something like that should be off limits. Something about missing children, a health-related update, a blockbuster movie that everyone’s watching, or that new song by a popular artist can be safe talking points.
Listen and Build on Her Words
Once you get her talking, put up your girl talk radar up high and wide and catch all the keywords she’s uttering. Pick up those you can relate with or have some knowledge of and go from there. Here’s an example:
“I have to say your shoes really look nice.”
“Oh, thank you! I got it from the mall at a sale.”
“On sale? They definitely look top of the line! When was that?”
“Oh just last week! My girlfriends even got the same ones but in a different color.”
“You know what they say, birds of the same feather shop together! (insert shared chuckles here) I’m wondering if you’d like to have coffee for free… With me.”
Do you get the drift? If you’re too nervous to ever take note of what she’s actually saying, you’re both putting yourself in an awkward position and are making it obvious to her that you’re not tuning in to her – which is a big turn off.
Some Critical Points to Remember
Humor is your best friend. If you can insert a joke here and there or a funny observation, do so. You’ll have her laughing all the way to a date with you.
Be polite at all times. Nothing turns on a girl more than being shown respect. That’s definitely how to talk to girls effectively.
Be confident, but don’t be cocky. Keep that laidback coolness and keep the self-praise down. Instead, focus on complimenting her sincerely or noting what she said and picking up on those.
Relax. When you are at ease, you think better and you’ll pull off that conversation without breaking out in a sweat. Except maybe if her hotness is really so overwhelming. But that’s no excuse to go all puppy dog or needy on her.